last week was one of those weeks were you question everything up to the point that changes your views on things. the knee injury that i had last year - well, i reinjured it last week & damaged my other knee in the process of trying to save the weak one. i had to have surgery on it, which was the first time i had ever had surgery done to my body. i try not to recognize fear in any state, only to understand reality & the reality of it was, it needed to be done. 
i now have screws in my kneecap holding it together, being that it broke in half upon impact because the tendon that allows a human to bend their knee, snapped/popped/broke.. so just imagine walking (or in this case, doing something once again, for someone else) & your knee gives, you feel a pop & you collapse.. shit is just painful thinking about it. 
i spent about 4 days in the hospital & watched the world literally change on me, right before my eyes. i watched people change & reposition themselves in a corner that they left me standing in by myself, when they were the ones who invited me to stand in WITH them. i laid & thought about alot, as i always do on the go but there's something different when you have nothing BUT time - in THIS sense, i can barely walk & will be like this for the next couple months. i've come to terms with a few things & plan to progress forward with knowing with these new knowings, in the efforts of trying to understand & overcome them. personally, i believe i now have to watch my back a little more than i already & always was before because the walls have gotten a little thinner & they've moved a little closer in on me. pressure. i don't know what i'm gonna do but then again, i DO know what imma do, but i have to take each day at a time. for this injury happening to me must be a blessing in disguise, as some think, but all my life i've been TOLD that & its just another setback, times 10. i'm determined to make sure that this works FOR me & not against me "but my team is outta place", as Nickelus F would say. we'll see though.*Ace
